Saturday, March 27, 2010

When I say I am Muslim, you turn the other cheek.

mood: cranky 
craving: to talk some sense into some ignorant people heads.. 

I woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning. Just one of those awful days and as many times as I said to myself, "It's my choice to make myself happy." It just didn't work. *sigh* I tried listening to Quran and reciting and even dikher. Nothing. AstagferAllah! May God forgive me.  You know what  the icing on the cake was?  One of my cousins emailed me -she never does- she started going on about how Christianity is the religion of God and on and on. Muslims are going to hell. Honestly, so many times I've come into situations like this since reverting to Islam, when my old friends classmates from grade school find out that I am Muslim, they are taken back and totally act so much different towards me. It happend on Face Book. That's exactly why I don't have Face book anymore. Darn, it happens with my family. Makes me sick to my stomach.

"There is no reply to the ignorant like keeping silence" 

My sister, Mona and Dad have never said a thing about me reverting, now that I remember my cousin Janis stood up for me to a couple of people (I love you, Jan Jan) we were always close. But, others... Pffft! sickening. Right now I don't care what I say, because I am only telling the truth and sick and tired of family people who don't know a thing about our beautiful religion, saying things that are made up and to try to hurt me. They don't even read about Islam, I know about their religion. HELLO, I was Catholic  most of my life.  They just wanna live in a bubble and never educate themselves about other religions. Just ignorance. Pick up the old forgotten habit and READ! It won't kill you.
"Fear always springs from ignorance" 

LOL You know what really makes me think.  I know there are so many people who read my blog, they're not Muslim and they never comment on the religious stuff I write about. Why? Maybe some of you, Non-Muslims can tell us. Or maybe y'all just don't know what to say? Please "dont be shy if you want to comment and ask anything. Or even any misunderstanding you have....and questions will be welcomed if you want to learn. What gets me is when people bash our religion without knowing anything about it. But if you have a Q, ask away and I'll try to answer or if I don't know I'll ask someone who knows better. If you are too shy to leave a comment, you can send me a little message," Come get to know us. I do think there's more good people in the world than bad, right? I want to always believe that.  I have 3 very close friends from my childhood. They have never judged me and always accepted me with open arms. They are all Catholic. Thanks for being so open minded, girls. I love y'all.

"Nothing in the world is more dangerous than a sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity" 

I am so done with my family these people. When I go back to Texas, I just wanna see my father and siblings, my Uncle Rudy and my mom's cousin (aunt sylvia) and her daughters. That's all. Seriously. No one takes any intrest in my life since I've been gone. Maybe because they believe that my ARAB husband beats me and I can't go out. It doesn't matter to me. In these almost ten years of being away from my family, NO one has ever called me or kept in touch with me. Only my dad and siblings have. No one else. I am so done with them. I don't need them. My parents raised us kids to always be considerate of everyone's feelings, I did just that. I tried to keep in touch. I did my part. I thought at least they would reach out and try to keep in touch. Since it's a sin to disown your own family, I will never cut ties with them. But, I won't look for them anymore like I did when I found Facebook. It was very obvious that they weren't interested.

Well, this post has just been a rant post. I guess I am allowed. Just as long as I stay close to my dad and siblings. That's all that matters to me.

"The greatest ignorance is to reject something you know nothing about"

P.S. I am smiling now. I feel a lot better after this post. Thank you God for guiding me to the religion of PEACE, LOVE , HAPPINESS and TRUTH. I am so blessed to be MUSLIM. So, so blessed.

Those of you out there who want to know about Islam, just ask.  I am not asking y'all to revert to Islam. LOL We are peaceful people. Don't let ignorance get the better half of y'all.

final whisper: "I am not ashamed to confess, I am ignorant of what I do not know" 

Thank you Dad, for never judging me.

A big thanks to my loving family/friends here in UAE! Honestly, if it wasn't for y'all my world would be empty. I LOVE Y'ALL.

God guide them and us.


Anonymous said...

Reading is a great gift to humanity.

Sadly, hardly anyone wants to read, not about things that matter. A book will take 2 or 3 weeks to read. And we all think we are so important that we dont have the time.

Its how people are. Listening to a person (often who is ignorant themselves) for 3 minutes is easier than reading for 3 weeks.

It's being lazy. And maybe afraid that what you find might change your mind.

And a change of mind is very scary for so many.

Dr. Tariq Ramadan once wrote "Go, you will return." basically meaning that no matter what you think you think or what you want to think, in the end you will come back to Islam.

Maybe that is scary for some, to read, to understand, and to have a change of mind. Today so many what to be "right," being "wrong" is almost a fear.

I liked this post, lol. All it needed was ninjas and chinese vampires!!!

qistina said...

its cool, now that you know who your real family and friends we're muslims, we always have Allah when others turns their backs on us,

'But if they turn away, Say: "God sufficeth me: there is no god but He: On Him is my trust,- He the Lord of the Throne (of Glory) Supreme!' at-tawbah (9:129)

OmAbdullah said...

Oh i had so many people like this when i reverted and came to uae. Wow really shows who truly loves you!

Honestly this was a really great post. RAW and great! no buttering it up. I think you really needed to write that... to get it out there. I bet you feel better now.

I agree with everything you said... Alhamdulillah for your dad and siblings!

You know I love you tons... **big hugs** hope you feel better tomorrow!

Random Muslima said...

Salamu alaykum habibati. like it says on the side of your very own blog

"I've learned from studying Islam and being Muslim, that if your happiness is based on people approving of everything you do, you're doomed to fail. Islam helped me stand up and take responsibility for everything to do with me."

I don't mind it sis. They have a big problem, they are not guided by Allah. The ignorance that follows from it is just the tail of teh problem. May Allah guide them.

Alhamdulillah you are feeling better by now-

Sweet_November said...

thank you sis for the wonderful post
i know its hard to be a part from the pple we love but God is always there for us no matter what we do, his mercy reaching us...
we ove you too :)

Cheryl said...

I'm sorry your family is being ridiculous. ((hugs))

*Gazelle* said...

Your an amazing person to know so by you old friends/family not being bothered they're losing out. Alhamdulliah you have so many other people who love and accept you for who you are!! xx

UmmRania said...

Salamu Alaikum

You know honestly I really like it when people want to speak WITH (not TO) me about Islam, even if they have misconceptions I think that when someone gets enough courage to tell you these things it means they actually do really care about you. They believe you are going to hell for your beliefs, and by talking about it to you shows they do care. There is a right and wrong way of approaching someone, however I do think that it shows more of a person to say something than to just think it and pretend everything is great.

*Big hug*

Bliss said...

Your post truly made me smile :)
You make our religion sound so beautiful (i know it is of course) but to none muslims out there too!
You should be the next Hamza Yusuf!

athoofa said...

Awwww I'm so sorry you had a bad day cuz of the letter from your cousin :(

Loved all the quotes you put up and agree with all of them totally...

Like the others said, don't let them get to you aunty. It will be a struggle but keep trying to spread the beautiful message of our religion and keep the light of Islam shining. Allah says:

"They intend to put out the Light of Allah (the religion of Islam, this Qur'an, and Prophet Muhammad ) with their mouths. But Allah will complete His Light even though the disbelievers hate it"

Remember the Prophet (sallalahu alaihi wasallam) and His Companions. And how they struggled against their family, friends and the whole community. They were persecuted emotionally, verbally and even physically but they were patient and continued and at the end they for them was victory!!

Our duty is only to convey, if we do our part Allah will take care of the rest...

May Allah reward you and bless you for your efforts! Aameen!

Erika said...

It's never bad to vent, especially on your own blog lol...but people really are ignorant.

When I started high school and was first introduced to the many different religions around the world, I became really interested in the Islamic religion...I even joined the student-run Muslim Student Association & made a lot of new Muslim friends. We would meet up every week just to talk...about religion. We would learn about the Islamic religion as well as others. My parents really, really thought I was crazy walking around in my MSA t-shirt...haha.

Now, I'm not really a religious person...I just haven't found my place in any one religion or anything like that (although I'm a confirmed Catholic).

Anyway, don't stress over ignorant people. They will always be there...but at least you have your family who unconditionally loves you :)

Twizzle said...

as-salaam aleikum wa rahmatullah,

ohh I know what you mean Texan! I have only experienced negativity from a few family members, but it was most noticeable with my co-workers. Its like I had worked with them for over a year and a half and they liked me then but then I told them I was now a Muslim and quite a bit distanced themselves from me.

I have a post in the works about me working for an airline and seeing the change in attitudes from people (both co-workers and passengers) from before I was Muslim to after.

Inshallah they will see things are not what they think it is when you visit them. At least inshallah some of them will.

Erika-- "Now, I'm not really a religious person...I just haven't found my place in any one religion or anything like that (although I'm a confirmed Catholic)"

I was confirmed Buddhist but I was pretty much like you before-- I just though as long as I am living my life as best as I can and not hurting anyone, then I am doing just fine.

It took a while for me to accept Islam just because I had to get past seeing the difference between what was cultural and Islam. :)

Shahirah Elaiza said...

Wasn't it great to get it all out? =)

Glad you're feelin better hun. You know anger's just not worth dwelling on. You have a family who loves you, friends who cheer you on, a place to call home, a kind heart, and most importantly you have Allah swt through Islam. Hun, you have it all mashaAllah.

People who are insecure will always try to break you down. You do the exact opposite as you are contented with what life has brought you. You don't feel the need to judge or hurt others because you're just... happy.

See you on MSU =) Been awfully busy with Uni... like you can't imagine hence the MIA.

Noor said...

Asalam Alaykum,

I hate days like that when you just know nothing will heal but the day to end. Sorry about your cousin. I have went through it a lot as well. I do not really speak with anything but my very very close family and they do not say anything to me anymore alhumdullah. You know how it is in the South. Good gracious they think Catholics are like the worst thing ever where I am from, lol imagine me being Muslim. Everyone thinks I am brainwashed and God will bring back though, lol.

Susanne said...

Even when you rant you are so cute, Texan. I just find your blog adorable and I imagine you this way as well. Hugs, Sweetie! I wish you joyful days!

Melissa said...

Salam Alaikum sister. It really is hurtful when family members or old friends treat you different when they find out you're Muslim :( I've been there.
Inshallah you'll be feeling better tomorrow!

Mujahada said...

I guess we just really have to be patient with these people. I know it's tough but that's the best way to approach it. They obviously believe in what they are sending you. I guess you have to look at it the other way around. If you grew up a Muslim and had a friend who later left Islam, you would be devastated and maybe one day get the courage to contact that old friend and tell them about Islam and HOW you believe that anyone who doesn't accept it is going to hell. I doubt these people have bad intentions. Allahu Alam. May Allah guide you in your approach and response to these people <3

hispanic muslimah said...

“Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.”-Dr.Seuss
Those who had something negative or disrespectful to say about you being yourself, reverting to Islam never mattered in the first place. That's why I stop myself from saying I lost "friends" due to reverting to Islam. I have to admit though it's much harder to accept that when it comes to family members...bc we especially want our family to accept us and belong to them. I was mostly conflicted about reverting bc of fears of what others (including my family) would say or think about me.
Life is just too short to live to please others or walk on tippy toes to not tick ppl off bc of your choice of religion.
InshaAllah with time those meant to be part of your life will see how much Islam has changed you for the better.
About non-muslims not commenting or asking questions on your blog...I get the same thing but in my actual personal life.
I always tell people that I'd rather them ask me a question they consider to be really stupid than make a really stupid assumption and judge me by a stupid assumption.
Hope you feel better sis.
Lately, I feel since I'm about to marry a born Muslim Pakistani, I've been getting those types of's like ppl didn't believe I was a Muslim until now.

Miss Dreamer said...

Sweetie that is such a great post! I am so glad you said everything that was on your mind and got it out of your systen. It is healthy to express yourself thw way you have done here. What I like about your post is that you managed to say a lot about the subject, yet without hurting others or insulting them in any way. I admire that about you sister and it just shows all your readers what a great and amazing person you are.

As long as you know you have done the right thing, nothing else matters. Along the way, I have learned that you can never satisfy people, even when you they know you are on the right track. Do not mind anubody sweetie.

Remember that we are always here for you and we love you so much.

Melissa said...

Oh gosh girl I totally know how you feel!!!!!!!!!!! Still have stuff like this from my family! Crazy. Love you sis!

Rene´s Bare Essentials said...

Salaam Alaikum sister!

I feel your pain! I lost so many friends when I reverted to islam. The ones who didnt turn their backs on me started to spend less time with me since we had a different ideology on what "fun" is. They prefered dancing, going out in mixed settings, I didnt. Over time I lost all of my old non-muslim friends. As for family, sure they were upset about me reverting to islam, especially my mom who made it difficult for me, but alhamdulillah they are still there for me which says a lot. My sister who I was never close to growing up, was very supportive and now we are very close. Last May I moved to spain and all of my muslim friends back home kept in contact for a month or so and then just stopped writing. I was the only one making an effort to keep in touch and that started to bother me. I would only hear from them if they had a problem and needed my help solving it. When things were going good for them they would ignore my emails for weeks or months until finally I just stopped writing. I understand distance makes things difficult but it really opened my eyes to who my real friends are. And I realized my one true friend is my sister, a non-muslim! Alhamdulillah your family is accepting of your reversion and in the end, family is what matters the most!

Umm Aaminah said...

A'salaamu alaikum sister. Alhamdulillah I have been blessed with a very supportive close family but the others (uncles, aunts, cousins, etc) either ignore me at family reunions or are verrry uncomfortable with me. :-) And I'm ok with that alhamdulillah. Insha'Allah He will make it easy for you and keep you close to those you love who love you back. Ameen!

Anonymous said...

((((Big Hug))))
That sucks!

I can't stand when people tell other people "your going to hell"

Why can't people atleast try to understand other peoples ways & if you still don't agree with them just agree to disagree.

& I know exactly what you mean about "family"...sometimes in the end friends are more family than your family ever was.

Sometimes just getting all your feelings out there makes you feel atleast a little bit better =P

Amina said...

Asalamu aliakuam!
Mujahada and mashaAllah others too^ took the words outta my mouth ;) Just wanted to let you know that I am still here, following your lovely blog, wanting to comment but finding that the many wonderful readers of your blog have said all that I had to say.

Ooo and hugssssss of course :)

Rachel said...

I don't follow a religion, but I believe in God. I personally don't believe that there is ANY wrong belief system, and I don't believe that long as you live your life to be the best person you can be, and make up for your mistakes, etc going to hell. And ESPECIALLY not because of your religion. So people who say that if you're not one specific religion, you're going to hell...they anger me more than anything.

I say as long as you're happy, and you're spiritually fulfilled, and you're tolerant of all other people and let them do their own thing and allow them to have their own beliefs as well...then forget about everybody else and what they have to say! If only the world could learn this, there would be so much more tolerance, less war, and more love for eachother.

San Antonio Cicily said...

I think the important thing here is that YOU are comfortable with your decision! If you are comfortable than don't worry what others think. I am Christian and have had many Arab friends try to convert me! It goes both ways! I as well as my father receive a lot of criticism from my conservative republican family for being against the war in Iraq and for supporting some causes in the middle east! I think sometimes that people refuse to look at all sides of an issue or flat out refuse to try and understand and hear others points of view. It's sad really because when communication compassion and sharing as well as trying to understand someone elses situation or point of view doesn't happen than you can never really understand or break down the barriers that separate us! I just don't think you can make an educated decision without hearing everyones point of view and understanding their situation! each one thinks his side is the ONLY truth and that the rest are wrong. They should look at the pyramid from above to see all sides and get the collective truth".instead of refusing to hear what anyone else has to say. This is not good, you need to see the full spectrum! ((MartinezAli Al-Wardi, an Iraqi scholar, once wrote "The truth never comes in one package. Truth is like a pyramid. Different people look at different sides of it and each one thinks his side is the ONLY truth and that the rest are wrong. They should look at the pyramid from above to see all sides and get the collective truth".)) I don't know if anything I said makes since sometimes you just have to say to these people "ASK ME IF I CARE"!

UmmKhaled said...

Wish I had my phone to call u but I left it at OmAbdullah's (ooops) anyways this is an excellent post. I did not recieve too much of this from people around me at all. Only one sister but she really doesn't care in the end I think. Just snarky comments but she is fine now and loved my DH and stuff. No one really gave me is really sad that it comes down to this and they don't even realize it is THE SAAAAAAAAAME GOD as them...not like we worship an elephant or a BOX...anyways just weird and it is allll IGNORANCE...

love you...hope you feel better...wanna have a coffeee with you and LAUGHHHHH until my eyes tear up!

"ALLL STAINED and a pait of "Sarwal" (Instead of a bag of CHIPS LOL!)"

Love Kasey

MaMa MishMish said...

You know...just keep doing what you have been doing. If someone is open to learning and understanding, then that is what Allah has put in their heart. If there is a spark, Alhamdulilah, if not, then you know your intentions were have a beautiful heart, MashaAllah. Love you Sis ♥

Anonymous said...

you know that by living through all of this you're getting more and more good deed written by angels on your right shoulder, right?! :)

It's great to know that you're standing still despite all the bad situations u've been through whether from your family's side or friends :)

When you decide to visit Kuwait, you will find a true friend waiting for you :*

Texan in UAE said...

Sweet crazy, your so right and yes I knew about the angels. Alhamdulilah! I have my chin and head high! As long as I am happy! that's all that counts!!!! (((((((hugs)))))))

Mama mish.. I love you! AND YOU always know what to say!!!! May Allah reward you for making me smile ameen

Purple Pyro said...

This was a great post :)
I always find myself complaining about the weird looks and nasty comments we get in the street, but this reminds me that it's much harder for someone who reverts to Islam, because they don't always have a network of family/friends they can instantly fall back on for support. I think it shows true strength that you can stand up to being shunned by these people for the sake of your faith. Some of us who are born into Islam don't realise how lucky we are.

Because life is beautiful.


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