Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Tell me a secret Thursday...

mood: tired
craving: a long nice swim in the sea

Salam Alikom (Peace be with you)  to all my Muslim readers and Hola to all my non-Muslim readers. It's the weekend here in UAE, I can't wait to spend some time with my family. I hope all of y'all have a blessed weekend. To those in the west, one more day and your week is over.. Hooray! Now, on to my post of the day. This should be a lot of fun.

{idea brought to you by another blog I read and love}

Welcome, to the first round of "Tell me a secret Thursday"

Here are the rules, here's how it's played:

This is your big chance to anonymously share some secrets you've been keeping to yourself. I think it would be really interesting. They can be small secrets, big secrets, scary secrets, juicy secrets, depressing secrets...There's no judging, anything and everything is valid.

Here's how it works:

1) This is open to anyone who wants to participate, from regular follower to casual visitor.

2) Post a secret anonymously, no names please.

3) I don't plan to censor content or language. However I do reserve the right to remove anything which appears to be posted with the sole intent of offending.

4) I am doing this because I know we all have secrets to hide, we all need someone to listen, and we all need to know that someone is going through something similar.

5) and remember... one of these secrets, will be mine.

So leave your secret below... for everyone knows, we all have secrets, big or small.

final whisper: Three can keep a secret, if two of them are dead.
Benjamin Franklin


Anonymous said...

Wa alaikum salam sis! I love your posts as always!!! Love your "secret" idea! :)

My secrets: 1. I want to lose enough weight to make sure my dh won't go after a second wife. :( I know that sounds insecure and I am to an exent. *sigh*

2. I am wanting to have a 3rd baby but dh doesn't know yet. Not sure I even want to bring it up. Don't worry I won't be getting preggy on purpose without him knowing about it first but I just miss having a little baby to cuddle.

3. I know this really sounds awful but I INTENSELY DISLIKE most of my family. :( Sad I know but honestly true. A handful of people in my family are who are treasured in my heart---the rest I could care less about. :(

Anonymous said...

I am a bit jealous of a friend of mine that just got married because she has no time to spend with me anymore :( And I feel guilty for it.

Anonymous said...

Sometimes I just to leave everyone and everything.

Anonymous said...

A'salaamu alaikum everyone. I adore my husband but still have memories of my sex life pre-Islam. :-( Alhamdulillah I don't dwell on them but I have some memories and desires that are hard to get over and sometimes I feel like my sexual life now is boring, astaghfirallah. :-(

Please make dua for me, sisters, that I am able to overcome my desires and be satisfied with the wonderful zawj Allah swt has given me. Aameen.

Anonymous said...

I often think my wife is cheating on me, but I know it's all in my mind because of my father cheating on my mother. I don't want to get hurt. I hope she doesn't leave me, because I always tell her she's cheating. I love her so much.

Anonymous said...

My Mother and Father are very strict Orthodox Catholics. Every night they make me kneel in front of the cross on our fireplace for one hour, to repent for all my sins. Sometimes they get me up in the middle of the night to go and kneel in front of the cross. They have been making me do this since I was a child- I am now 23 years old, and I'm trying to find a way out of this. I don't want to hurt my parents, because I love them. I am currently looking into other religions and Islam is one of them.

Anonymous said...

I often think about leaving my husband.

Anonymous said...

I'm pregnant. and whats worrying more than having a healthy baby..LOL..getting my size 0 waist back..LOL...i know its sad buttttt its important to me.

Anonymous said...

I have been in school for a while now, but deep down I wonder if I'm even capable of accomplishing what I am trying to and I hope all these years don't go down the drain.

Anonymous said...

Sometimes i feel like a bad muslim, i seen to be wanting to change everyday, but nothing comes out of it, pray for me.

Anonymous said...

I am a convert to islam, and I have a secret jealousy of Muslims born and raised that have strong Muslim families around them. Even though I've a loving husband and child and some close Muslim friends, sometimes I feel alone...especially on Ramadan and Eid when everyone is getting together with their families and Cultures.

I also wonder at times why some raised-muslim sisters are friends with other converts or American raised Muslims but not me; even though I've been around same sisters as much, for some reason they don't seem to reach out to me in any way to deepen our friendship.

I am supposed to think the best of my sisters, but I can't help to think that it has to do with the fact that most of the sisters they seem to befriend are thinner, more attractive, and better dressed (i.e. have more money). I know these sisters like my personality and pretty sure they respect me as a sister, inshaAllah.

Wow, those secrets make me seem pathetic and insecure....well, I won't argue that, lol

Anonymous said...

I come to your blog almost everyday, I want to become Muslim, but I can't imagine what it would do to my family. I am lost.

Anonymous said...

Everyday I look in the mirror and want to cut my face into pieces. I've come very close to doing it. Why can't I just be pretty.

Anonymous said...

Since Islam became popular after 911, I read into it. I used to think Muslims were nothing but savages. Now, I have changed my thoughts. I've thought of becoming Muslim, but I don't think I could. I am a gay male. If someone could shead some light on this, it would be much appreciated. I am struggling with being gay.

Anonymous said...

I have been reading each one's secret,and wished i could help all of u really..
I haven't got secrets, i can say i am a very very jealous woman & i can annoy my hubby sometimes with this..emm it isnt a secret i guess LOL:S

Anonymous said...

my husband is not treating me good at all. i can barely stand him. can't leave him.. he'd never let me have the kids, he'd rather kill than let me have them.

Anonymous said...

I smoke sometimes and I don't even have a strong will to quit the habit. As a muslim I should be stronger than this :/

Anonymous said...

My baby isn't my husbands. She's now 6 yrs old and he has no idea. He even thinks she looks like him. I just came across your blog and never knew any race could be muslim. I just thought people in saudia arabia could? Please don't think I'm dumb, I'm from the states.

MoOn SmiLe said...

Great Post..wonderful...I might steal its idea if you won't mind sister..?

Anonymous said...

I can't stand my mother in law, if I told my husband that, he would divorce me. Every time she opens her mouth I just want to deck her. I ask for guidance and mercy from god.

Anonymous said...

when i see a muslim woman, i always feel sorry for her. You just have to be a good person in and you will go to heaven. I don't understand why it's a must to cover your hair? I come to your blog a lot and would like to read a post on your covering. I will try to find other sources. I hope your dad doesn't force you muslim ladies or your husbands. Isn't it hot?

Anonymous said...

I can't stand my mother in law, if I told my husband that, he would divorce me. Every time she opens her mouth I just want to deck her. I ask for guidance and mercy from god.

I said that, above.

I'm a very practicing mormon.

Sarira said...

Wow, lots of secrets.

I hope things get easier for each of you. Please remember that you are not alone and that God is near.

For those thinking about Islam, for the women at least, why don't you visit Texan's cute Musliah forum? It is not only about Islam- it's got a beauty section, joke section, cooking sectionS, etc. We'll happily answer your questions :)

2nd to last anonymous, I'm sure Texana's gonna answer you, but as a Muslim woman who wears the veil, I thought it might interest you to read a post I wrote about it- I didn't explain why we do it, but I said something that might interest you:

For the person who doesn't feel pretty- the media has lied to all of us, alright! They've come up with a fake image- airbrushed- etc. and we're trying to live up to a standard that isn't real. I am sure that you are beautiful! God created you :)

I hope things gets better for all of you :)

Anonymous said...

My secrets have lost the language because of the continous pain it gives so wont be able to share anything. If I ever got a heart to write down I would come back here :)
Love you always and forever my lil butterfly :)

Anonymous said...

I want to be young forever. Not just young, but a child. I'm 22 and secretly get sooo happy when people treat me like I'm really young and innocent. People love children. Children always get love, hugs, affection. The world is always concerned that kids get enough love. People don't love adults. I feel like I won't be loved anymore if I get older.

(I know my family loves me, but that's just how I feel.)

Anonymous said...

I miss my parents and sis alot and sometimes I know we could save some money and make plans to go and visit them but my husband always put other things first,also important for us and the future of our kids, but sometimes I really think that he doesn't care about it, and other times I see he cares but it's just that we have mooore things to do and if they (my parents)are good then that's the important, I just wish can see them :(

Anonymous said...

Sometimes is hard to share secrets but I wish I was stronger and had less regrets. I can't really say that I ever knew or will ever know what would feel to be happy and content, protected, cherished and valued. Alhamdulillah. Maybe in Jannah Inshallah. This life is only a stop...

Anonymous said...

I am a PROUD Muslim woman.

But I wear the niqab (face veil) only because I am ASHAMED of my weight and don't want anyone to see who the obese girl is underneath.

Anonymous said...

My husband is interested in islam, if he became a muslim, I would leave him. He tells me, Allah is God, is this true. I haven't read anything on islam. I should, I deeply am confused. I'm Lutheran.

Anonymous said...

I really want to be married to an arab guy so I am really cranky and bitchy to my family about it. I dislike my culture and spend every waking minute of it telling people but I don't know who I am trying to prove this to them or myself. I secretly chat to guys on the net to make my little illusion of marrying an arab guy seem real. I know it's sad but it's what gives me a bit of hope every day.

I really want to come clean about my issue with smoking, My hijab is stopping me from grabbing a cigarette and just puffing away. I sometimes am embarrased when I ask non-muslims for a cigarette or tell them I smoke and they look at me with my hijab on and think I am retarded. I've cut down alot but I just want to calm my cravings ( I was smoking pre-hijab days)

Anonymous said...

I am afraid of having move children, not because of being a good parent, or having enough money...or for any reasons having to do with myself. I am afraid for the simple reason that my dh will keep pressuring me about my weight. I sometimes feel the desire to starve myself or puke....only to make myself so skinny that I am sick, not because I want to be that way, but I just want him to see how much its hurting me, because my words arent enough for him to see.

Love of Islam said...

Assalamu alaikum and peace,

To the many people that wrote with an interest in islam without a clue as to where to start, I'd like to offer a little advice.

There are many places you can learn about islam online, but of course some are better (or more accurate) than others.

Try (tabs on the left to learn about Islam) and (or if you prefer to speak to a person, you can call why islam at 877-why islam).

These will both offer you valuable resources.

To the woman whose husband is interested in Islam. A muslim man is allowed to be married to a Christian or Jewish woman; therefore he would not have to divorce you if he became Muslim. However, if you feel that way, maybe you should learn about Islam and see the rights offered to the wife.

For the gay man interested in Islam. In Islam we believe that Homosexuality is a sin; however, one's thoughts and one's actions are two different things. Allah knows your true intentions in your heart, so turn to Him and seek guidance and forgiveness and inshaAllah He'll lighten your load.

To the one that worries about their family's opinion if they become a Muslim. It is hard at times to do things that will upset the people that we love (or care for their opinions), but also, if one truly believe in Allah, than they know that He created them and everything in their to whom should we give our allegiance and our most consideration? Typically when one converts, the family does have a negative reactiong. The level varies from person to person, but also, for most people, over time it starts to level out. Especially after the family sees that Islam, for most people, makes you a better person, more loving and considerate of family.

Islam is the truth and the right way.

For the lady that questioned Hijab...MOST Muslim women are NOT forced to wear hijab. I say most because of course I am realistic that there are some cultural people that do so...however, in Islam there is no compulsion. I wear hijab and I am a Convert (i.e. my family is Christian) and I was not married when I began wearing hijab...therefore, there's no other option than that it was my choice. Allah, swt, created women in a beautiful way and created man to be attracted to women's beauty. This is a requirement for the human race to continue. It took me maturity and knowledge of our deen for me to accept that men and women are different. It does not mean women are lesser, but they are different. Typically (there are exceptions) if you ask a man what he is most attracted to in a woman, he will name a physical attribute, and if you ask most women, they will say something like intelligence, a sense of humor, compassion, etc. This is the way Allah made us; most women are more emotional based and most men are more intellectually or base driven.

So a Muslim woman is supposed to be modest and protect the gifts that Allah gave her; keeping it safe for her husband and her family only to see. Also, Muslm men are required to dress modestly as well, loose clothing (no muscle shirts), no flashy jewelry or clothing, etc. Nothing that should have the obvious ability to attract a woman's eye. And they should make themselves more attractive for their spouse's in their homes.

Also, I'm not sure if you are aware of it or not, but in the Bible it tells women to cover their heads. Also, Jewish women are supposed to cover their heads as well. Also, think of any picture or stature you have seen of Mary, mother of Jesus, a.s....She always has her hair covered in them with something. This is the best example of a woman we can find; so why would we not want to emulate her character and behavior? There is an entire chapter in the Quran called Mariam (Mary); maybe if you get the time you can read it, inshaAllah.

Okay, I could go on and on, but I'm sure people are starting to get bored with my post, lol.

If anyone has any sincere questions, feel free to mail me.

Peace ma salaama
Sr Lisa

Anonymous said...

everyone thinks I am a happy person, but I'm not. :(

Texan in UAE said...

Love of Islam, you said it all so well. I applaud you. Jazkay Allah Khair, sister.

I am sorry I've been very busy and no time for the net. Thank God for my bb, it let's me at least put the replies on my blog.

I am really sorry for a lot of y'all. Like I said, Love of Islam said it all so well. I don't know what to add. I will be talking about "hijab" head scarf soonish.

I pray for each and everyone of y'all. May Allah (God) guide us all ameen

I won't be doing this every thursday, I will maybe be doing this every once in a while. :) Have a nice night.

Texan in UAE said...

Sarira, Jazkay Allah Khair sis. (((hugs))) you always know what to say... You're brilliant! masha'a'Allah!

Anonymous said...

Yes do it every Thursday it is a nice idea.

My Secret:

I hate my Mother in Law too. Like a seething black hate because I feel she is in competition with me and jealous of me and that I am with her son and have kids with him. I want MY own family and NOTHING of her!

I am so obsessed with my weight I drive my whole family and probably my friends crazy. It consumes my thoughts. I know I am not fat. I am a little overweight but I feel I have to be perfect :(

I had my first child out of wedlock with a muslim man. His family have no idea.

My friend who I thought was one of my closest never answers my phone calls and never calls me. I love her so much but I feel now I can't call again because I don't want to beg for a friend or look desperate but I thought what we had was a real friendship. It hurts me a lot :( I also feel weird if she was to call me and be my friend again because nwo I question was she REALLY my friend to begin with. Maybe I am not important enough so I am easily discarded.

I also feel like I wanna just run away sometimes...I yell a lot for no reason and constantly am saying I am sorry.

Anonymous said...

This isn't exactly a secret, but more of a vent. I HATE it when women don't display some common sense when it comes to their relationships. Why do some women act like being a doormat has some basis in Islam?

Shahirah Elaiza said...

I just came across this post and I think it's an excellent idea. I love the honesty behind all these secrets. Nobody lives perfect lives and we don't have to feel ashamed of that.

Anonymous said...

I am madly inlove with married man and has three kids. He is my boss. We are in a relationship. My mind is telling me to let go but my heart can't. I want to be his wife. Even as a second wife I am willing to accept. Because i love him so much.


Because life is beautiful.


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