craving: To fall in love with my America again
Salam Alykom (Peace be with you) to all my Muslim brothers and sisters out there. Hola to all my non-Muslim followers.. I pray that everyone is in the best health and faith and your week started out good. Just been trying to get used to the, "American" life here.. It's coming along... I wish it would come faster...
When I was little I always loved to travel the world with my family. I always knew that America always would have a special place in my heart no matter where I went in this life. But, since I've traveled abroad at an older age, I fell in love with this small country that a lot of people are just getting to know.. This country gave me what I wanted in my life; not only does it have everything I love, it has very special people there that I love and will never forget. This certain country took my mind and my heart away from my America. I never thought a small place like this would take my heart. I never thought any other place would replace the country everyone wants to come to make their dreams.. I thought and only dreamed to live the rest of my life there.. This country is United Arab Emirates. Look it up on the map, you can't miss it, because it has my heart right on top of Abu Dhabi. lol
But, now that i am back in the states, I feel a sense of loss. I feel like a foreigner in my own country.. Sad, but true.. I hate this feeling... It takes a while for me to get used to a place and I never thought it would take any time for me to get used to the place where I was born and raised and LOVED. Don't get me wrong, I still love America. I really do. I feel lost though. I've basically been out of the states for almost 10 years and I changed a lot. I adapted to a culture that took my heart/mind/soul and for some reason, it won't give it back to me. LOL Day in and day out I fight with my heart. I fight with it to at least let me adapt to my homeland easily. Change is never easy, they say and they sure are right. Am I ever gonna get used to this life in America again? Am I going to feel at home again? I guess I finally accepted being away from my family and living in a different country. I accepted it and now moving back has got my mind kind of at a loss. *sigh*
Sometimes in life, something bad has to happen in order for something good to come into your life again. I never questioned what God has planned for us. I know that God will always point me in the right direction, I still have faith. But, I just wanna fall in love with my America again.
Final whisper: I hope my mind and heart comes back to the states again. When? I don't know.. But, please come fast..
Texan, after UAE.....